


All I Want for Christmas

by ViennaWarren



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: 2014 Advent Challenge, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Gen, Holidays, M/M, Winter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-02
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-02-27 20:30:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 7,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2705762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ViennaWarren/pseuds/ViennaWarren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve and Bucky celebrate Christmas, set from 1926 to present. Written for the 2014 Advent Calendar Challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. For the Popcorn

1\. decorating the tree

Bucky Barnes is Steve's best friend and it's times like these that make Steve never forget it.

It's December and Bucky had invited Steve to come over and decorate the tree with him and his family. Even in elementary school, Steve recognises the significance of this invitation and eagerly accepts.

"I wanna use the scissors!" Bucky's kid sister screeches. Her hands open and close, reminding Steve of a small crab getting defensive. "Gimme, gimme!"

"Shut up, Rebecca." the nine-year-old counters, snipping away at a piece of red construction paper. "We're using them now."

Rebecca's lower lip curls and her eyes water. Steve stares at her happy, blonde curls and bites his lip. "Oh, c'mon Bucky, we're not really using them."

Bucky turns to look at him. "Whadya mean? We're cutting out ornaments!" 

The little girl sitting across from him whimpers miserably. 

"But we don't need them now, right? Just let Rebecca use 'em for a couple minutes." Steve suggests.

Bucky wants to say no. He wants to say no  _so bad_ because his stupid brat sister can't wait ten minutes. But he sees Steve and knows that it's bothering him, so he gives in. "Fine, here." He calmly hands the pair of scissors to his now grinning sister. She gets busy right away and cuts her ornament neatly in half. "Oh, brother." Bucky groans, wondering how he got stuck with such an imbecile for a sister.

"Hey Bucky, can you please pass me the glue?" 

Bucky obliges and observes quietly as Steve neatly glues two ends of ribbon to the pine-cone in his hand. "You're really good at that." he comments after awhile. Steve's small fingers move expertly and soon he has a little pile of pine-cone ornaments. "I just like art."

"Oh, these are wonderful!" Bucky's mother enters the room, all curls and pearls, and nods towards the pine-cones. 

Steve beams with pride. "Thank you, ma'am."

Mrs. Barnes turns to her daughter. "Rebecca dear, what are those?" she asks, indicating the scraps of green construction paper. 

"Christmas trees!" the little girls chimes, _snip snip snipping_ away.

Bucky snorts and has to bite the insides of his cheeks to keep from laughing. Under the table, Steve kicks him. He clears his throat. "Uh, Ma?"

"Hmm?"

"Have you strung up the popcorn yet?" Bucky's face is completely lit up and to be honest, he's more excited at the prospect of eating some of the popcorn than it being strung up on a fir tree.

"Not quite, but I'm working on it." she says, smiling. "Do you kids want some hot chocolate?"

Steve's jaw nearly drops. Hot chocolate. He's only had hot chocolate twice before and those were on very special occasions. 

Rebecca squeals excitedly and Bucky tries not to roll his eyes. "Yes, please. Can me and Steve have an extra big cup?"

Mrs. Barnes chuckles, making her way into the kitchen. "Yes. You and Steve can have an extra big cup."

 


	2. A Paddle a Day...

2\. something green

Bucky and Steve walk to school together every single day, rain or shine. Or snow. 

On this particular day, when Bucky comes to collect Steve, he knocks on the door and a little green Martian answers it. Or so it seems. 

In reality, it's just Steve. He's wearing hand-made knitted forest-green hat that's so large, it droops and covers his eyes. Bucky looks him up and down. It's only Steve's stupid ratty coat and this new hat keeping his body temperature up. 

"Hey, Buck!" 

 _Oh, this kid's gonna get it bad when we get to school_ , Bucky thinks, but he grins. "C'mon, let's get a move on. We're gonna be late!"

"Since when do you care about being late?" the ten-year-old asks, shutting the apartment door and locking it on his way out. The snow is coming down not hard per say, but definitely at an even place. It's already piled a half a foot high, at least. 

"Sister Loretta's had it out for me since day one."

"You mean since the day you openly called her a penguin?"

Bucky gets defensive. "What, she does!"

* * *

They're nearly on school grounds when it happens, just as Bucky figured it would. 

"When do you expect to grow into that hat, Rogers?" A voice shouts at him and a few other boys join in, laughing. "It's uglier than an ape's ass." 

Bucky whips his head around, only to see Thomas Coleman and his usual gang of idiots. "Come again?" he growls, fairly deep for someone in primary school. Steve tugs Bucky's coat sleeve. "Please, don't. It's fine." 

Bucky shakes him off and turns toward Thomas, hands balling into fists. "You're a real twit, you know that?" And it's Bucky that throws the first punch. He hits Tommy right in the jaw and sets him stumbling backwards a few feet. On cue, the two boys aiding Tommy take his place and one of them gets Bucky in the stomach, causing him to double over. As this happens, Steve throws a right hook at the one boy, which miserably misses.

"Steve--" Bucky pants, but Steve's already been hit a few times and he's still going. Squinting, Bucky can tell Steve's going to have a nasty black eye in the morning. 

There's a choked groan as Steve is nailed in chest. His feet fly out from under him and he's lying on his back in the snow. The stupid green hat is lying next to him, just as defeated-looking. It's at this moment Sister Loretta decides to make her grand appearance. Her black underskirts are fluttering at her ankles as she briskly stomps through the snow. 

Bucky's the only one standing. He wipes a bit of blood from his mouth and spits like he's seen the great fighters do in the pictures. The other boys start to stir on the ground. Steve blinks one eye open and tries to sit up.

"James!" Sister Loretta screeches, instinctively reaching for his ear. He yelps as she tugs it, hard. "You're coming with me to see Father Eligius."

"You're not even gonna hear my story?"

"Oh, I know exactly who started it." she says with a humourless laugh. "You know here at St. Francis we don't accept fighting of any kind. For every sin you commit--"

"A punishment always follows." Bucky mouths the words he's heard so many times right before he gets paddled. What a stupid, stupid green hat. But it's worth it. 


	3. Groceries and a Bad Saukarl

3\. something red

Whenever Steve needs to go shopping, it's always Bucky who accompanies him. 

Steve does have a mother and usually mothers do the shopping, but his ma is a nurse and works nights, meaning her only time for rest is when the sun is shining. Or when it's not shining, like this day. Grey clouds hang in the sky sending down a flurry of snowflakes. 

Bucky and Steve trudge through the deep snow. Steve can feel the snow seeping into his shoes and after a few minutes, his feet are completely numb. 

"So what are we off to get this time?" Bucky asks, hands shoved into his coat pockets.

Steve reluctantly takes a hand out of his pocket so that he can read out the shopping list. "Bread, beans, chicken, and oranges." At the last item, Steve can't help but smile. His ma likes to place orange peels on the window sills so after a few hours, the entire apartment smells like citrus. 

"Sounds like a plan." Bucky's breath comes out in a curl of smoke and Steve shivers. 

"Hello, Steven!" beams Mr. Ambrogi, smiling wide. "What can I do for you?" He's used to Steve coming around to buy his groceries here, though he never quite understands why a ten-year-old _scrawny_ thing is buying them as oppose to a parent.

"A loaf of bread and some oranges, please." Steve says, Bucky waiting patiently by his side. "And a pound of beans." Bucky adds. He also has become accustomed to Steve's usual shopping habits. 

Steve hands Mr Ambrogi the 20 cents and they're on their way again. 

Mrs. Glöckner is the butcher's wife and she isn't half as nice as Mr. Ambrogi. Bucky hates her but Steve won't permit him being cold towards her. Or at least, he doesn't enjoy it.

"You want the chicken." It's supposed to be an inquiry but coming from her, sounds like a statement.

Steve nods. "Yes ma'am."

"43 cents." 

Bucky stares daggers into her eyes. "Wasn't it 39 cents last month?"

Steve doesn't protest Bucky's accusation because he knows Bucky's right. He eyes the codfish, which is nearly half the price of chicken. If only his mother liked fish a little better.

"Might've been." Mrs. Glöckner snaps, cheeks bright red from the cold. Bucky wonders if her eyes are really a beady red underneath those dull, brown ones. "Things change."

"I'll take it." Steve announces, handing her the money. Bucky doesn't question his friend's decision and Steve is glad for it.

* * *

 

The walk home is easier, because Steve has groceries. They make him feel important, valuable to his mother. Bucky carries the chicken and beans which Steve has the bread and oranges. 

Finally, Bucky speaks up. "You think Mrs. Glöckner could get any fatter?"

"Bucky!" Steve nearly squeaks. "That's not nice at all!" But he can't help smiling. 

"Imagine if I took one of her beef roasts? Could you imagine her trying to run after me?" Bucky screws up his face in a mock imitation of the wretched lady. "'Come back here you dirty _saukarl!_ '"

"Buck," Steve says in between wheezing laughs, "that's terrible!" 

"What do you mean?" he counters. "My imitations are great!"

They both continue the walk home, cheeks flushed red and laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, please just forget that oranges probably wouldn't have been in season in the middle of December... oops!


	4. Stage Fright

3\. carolling 

It's a tradition at the St. Francis of Assisi School for Catholic boys and girls that the nuns to take them Christmas carolling. 

In primary school, the children are divided up into groups with different nuns. Thankfully, Bucky and Steve are both put in Sister Vivian's group. The only downside to Sister Vivian is that she's about a hundred years old, or so Bucky assumes. 

"Alright boys and girls." Sister hushes the children and reminds them to smile and have their best singing voice ready. The door opens, revealing a young, grinning couple. "One, two--"

Bucky gives Steve a "please kill me now" look and the group begins to sing. 

" _Hark! The herald angels sing, glory to the newborn King! Peace on Earth and mercy mild..._ "

Sister Vivian's nodding and waving her hands around. Bucky really can't tell if she's trying to conduct the children's orchestra or waving off a fly.

" _God and sinners reconciled._ " 

Steve glances over at Bucky and gives him an encouraging smile that says, "Keep going!" Every since Steve was moved into the soprano section, Bucky's been anxious to sing alone with altos.

" _Joyful all ye nations rise._ " Are those even the words? Is he even singing it right? 

" _Join the triumph of the skies._ " Bucky looks over to see Steve and wonders on how in the world he can sing and smile at the same time. 

And suddenly, Bucky forgets the words. All the words. He can't recall a single lyric. The others are on " _Jesus our Emmanuel, pleased as man with man to dwell"_. Frozen, Bucky's mouth clamps shut and he just stops. 

After the song is over, the pair clap and applaud their performance but Bucky's face is flushed and it has nothing to do with the cold. Sister Vivian doesn't even noticed when Steve switches over to the altos at the next house, just so he can be next to his friend. And Bucky doesn't forget the words this time.

 


	5. Courtyard Kisses

5\. people named carol

Bucky realises his feelings for Steve have surpassed friendship when he's sixteen. 

He tries to convince himself it's more of a brotherly kind of love, but Bucky knows better. So, to further hide this fact and to score masculinity points, Bucky finds the nearest, easiest girl to get to and makes her swoon. This chose girl is Carol Harris. 

Carol's hair is mysterious dark and perfect curls hang around her shoulders. Bucky twists her hair around his finger as their noses brush together. It's snowing in the courtyard, but they're completely alone in a sea of white. Carol's back is pressed against the brick of the academy. 

"Bucky," Carol says, almost breathless, "imagine if one of the Sisters were to catch us!"

"You've always been such a good girl." Bucky whispers back, his lips gently brushing against hers.

She pouts a little bit. "I'm not such a good girl!" Her arms are crossed against her chest defensively. 

"Really?" Bucky asks, eyebrows raised. "You're wearing your school uniform." He informs her, fingers playing with the collar of her dress. 

"So are you." she murmurs, pressing her lips to his mouth. They're kissing with a strong sense of desperation and with the thrill of being caught; it's exhilarating and adrenaline is shooting through both teenager's veins. Bucky feels Carol shiver against him and he guesses it has nothing to do with the freezing temperatures outside.

Carol's lips are warm and soft, unlike the dry, chapped lips of another girl he's kissed, Anna Lewis. Although she denies it, Carol really is a good girl and Bucky doesn't force anything on her. In fact, his tongue stays in his mouth the whole time. 

"Mmm... Bucky..." Carol says softly, breaking apart for a breath. "This is so nice."

Bucky can't think of anything to say, so his hand finds it's way up to the back of her hand and he gets lost in that dark hair again. But this time, their lips are brushing against each other with more desperation, more urgency, and all the while Bucky imagines it's Steve's lips he's kissing. 


	6. What is This Thing Called Love?

6\. christmas shopping

Steve hates Christmas shopping because it reminds him what he doesn't have. Actually, it reminds him of what his _mother_ doesn't have. He understands it isn't necessarily his fault that he can't work like Bucky does for his family; he can't help being sickly. 

However, Bucky hates shopping, especially Christmas shopping, so he never hesitates to drag Steve along as well. 

"So what are we looking for?" Steve asks, hoping to be at least somewhat helpful. 

Bucky opens the shop door for him and the two of them walk in. "Cole Porter."

"Cole Porter?" Steve tilts his head in curiosity. "The musician?"

"Yeah. Ma absolutely adores him." 

"Afternoon, boys." The shop keeper, an old man with a receding hairline, nods at them. "Anything I can help you find?"

"Nothing, we're fi--"

Steve rolls his eyes. Bucky's pride is too much for him, sometimes. "Cole Porter."

"Ah, the Mister Porter. Right this way, gentlemen." He leads them over to a small selection of albums. "We have an abundances of records, as you can see."

Bucky looks like he wants to differ, eyeing the records suspiciously. "Do you have 'What is This This Thing Called Love'?" 

Steve desperately tries not to laugh. Bucky, a guy would can beat people senseless, is asking for some kind of romantic music. The thought alone is comical in itself. 

"Yes, here we are." The man plucks in album from the selection. "This is the one."

Bucky nods approvingly. "Perfect."

"It's a fine tune, hmm?" 

Bucky blushes to his toes and Steve can't help but laugh now. "It's for my mother."

"Right. That'll be 32 cents." The shopkeeper doesn't look convinced.

Bucky hands him the money, annoyed, and practically snatches the record from him. "Thanks. Come on, Steve."

"He still thinks it's your record." Steve giggles, stumbling with laughter. 

"Shut up!" Bucky snaps, shaking his head. "It's for my _mother_."


	7. I'll Be Seeing You

7\. christmas cookies

When Bucky sees Ms. Rogers carrying the newspaper inside, he knows something's wrong with Steve.

Usually, in the mornings before school, they walk together, so Steve collects the paper. On top of that, Steve's ma works nights and there's no way she'd be awake and moving during the daytime unless...

"Oh, Bucky!" The young woman smiles tiredly at him. "Sorry, I didn't see you there."

Bucky smiles back, nervously. "Um... is Steve...?" He doesn't really know what he's trying to ask but she does.

"Sick today." 

"Is it bad?" Now he's worried. Sure, Steve's mother is a nurse but when Steve gets sick, he gets _sick_. 

She nods. "His fever's risen. I don't think he'll be back at school for the rest of the week, most likely."

Bucky can imagine Steve's annoyance at this statement. He hates missing school, for God knows why. "Yes ma'am. Uh, could you please tell him I hope he feels better?" 

Sarah Rogers thinks Bucky Barnes is a very good friend to Steve, maybe his only friend. "I definitely will."

"Thanks." He walks away from their apartment with a sinking feeling in his stomach. 

* * *

Later, before Bucky gets the chance to run off and check on Steve, his own mother requests help in the kitchen. Mrs. Barnes sends him off with a steaming bowl of vegetable soup, just like how her grandmother used to make it in Belfast. As Bucky's walking out the door, she calls out. "Wait! Take these over as well, dear." His mother stacks a tin of Christmas cookies on top of the soup container. Bucky can hardly keep himself from running all the way there.

* * *

His arms are completely full, but he just manages to kick the door a little with his shoe. Thank God for Sarah Roger's excellent hearing. 

"Why, Bucky!" she exclaims, looking rather surprised. 

"Sorry," he mumbles over the towering foodstuffs, "my mother sends her regards."

After he's put the soup and cookies down, Bucky has the chance to see how truly exhausted Steve's ma looks. He doesn't want to bother her, but he does want to see Steve. 

"Is it okay if I go and see Steve? Just for a little bit?"

By this time, Bucky knows what's best for Steve in these situations and Ms. Rogers realises that. She pulls up a chair and sits down. "For a little bit." she agrees. The teenager doesn't waste any time.

* * *

Steve is so skinny. 

Well, Steve is _always_ skinny, he just appears to be more so when he's ill. Pale, too. White as a sheet.

"Steve?" He means it as a whisper but his voice ends up cracking. 

The boy in the bed turns restlessly, mumbling in his sleep. His brow is dotted with sweat and his blond hair is matted to his forehead. Bucky stands by his bed. "Steve." he tries again, placing his hand on his friend's forehead. The heat radiating off him is intense for a fever. Forever the gentleman, Bucky takes out his handkerchief and dabs at Steve's face. This gentle touch is what wakes him up. 

"Mmm... B-Bucky?" Steve's voice is hoarse and raspy. 

"I'm here." Bucky answers. "How're you doing?"

"I'm fine." 

Bucky doesn't know whether to laugh or roll his eyes. "Yeah, obviously." He puts the handkerchief on the bedside table. "I brought my ma's vegetable soup. And Christmas cookies."

"Christmas cookies." Steve repeats, smiling. "I love those."

This fever's hitting him hard. "I know."

The rattling in Steve's chest makes Bucky anxious. "Just focus on gettin' better, okay?"

"I'll be at school tomorrow." Steve tells him, coughing. 

"Well, if you're not, I'll come see you again." 

Even through his glazed eyes, Steve looks serious. "I'll be there."

"Okay." Bucky ruffles his hair. "Punk."

"Jerk." Steve murmurs, eyes fluttering shut. 

"I'll be seeing you."

 

 


	8. Who Needs a Scarf

8\. snowman

Bucky finds Steve on the fire escape. He's squatting, hunched over something. 

Bucky tries not to laugh. "What are you doing?"

Upon hearing the sudden voice, Steve nearly jumps out of his skin. He whips his head around. "Buck! Jeez, you scared me."

"Sorry." Bucky replies, but he's laughing. Now that Steve's so conveniently jumped out of the way, he can see exactly what Steve's doing. It's a little, mini snowman. Just by scooping together the snow on the fire escape, it's about two feet tall. "What, a midget snowman?"

"Doesn't make him any less of a snowman." Steve tells him, sticking in two twigs as arms. 

Bucky reaches in his pocket and takes out a leftover piece of coal from the morning's art class. He bends down and carefully places the bits for eyes. Steve draws a lopsided smile on the snowman with his finger.

"He needs a scarf." Steve suggests, shivering as an icy wind practically blows through him. 

Bucky scoffs. "If anyone, you need a scarf. Does your mother know you're out here without any clothes on?"

"I'm wearing clothes!" the blond argues, his breath coming out in a puff of smoke. 

"Not sufficient ones; you'll catch your death out here."

"W-will not."

Bucky snorts. "Right. C'mon, let's go inside anyway. If you won't admit you're freezing, I will."


	9. The Bells of St. Mary's

9\. bells

Steve wasn't Catholic (although he had gone to a Catholic academy), but when those bells starting ringing at 7:00 AM, he was out the door heading off to Bucky's apartment. 

To be honest, Bucky didn't enjoy mass. He didn't always agree with the priest's homily and the kneeling on wood always left marks on his knees, even through dress pants. But bringing Steve along was better than suffering alone and as a Catholic, Bucky had to suffer. And Steve was helpful too. Whenever Bucky's eyes would flutter shut or his head would drop, Steve was there to elbow him a bit in the ribs. 

On this Sunday, the second Sunday of advent, Father Joseph wore all deep purple robes and lit the candle up on the altar. "God I ask you to pray for all these sinners, for they have chosen to be saved and forgiven. Let us bow our heads and pray."

Steve actually enjoyed church. He liked the praying, especially the prayers they'd had to memorise in school as children. The mass had a certain routine to it, a specific flow, and Steve liked that. It was a good memory for him and he always remembered the way those church bells sounded so early in the morning. 


	10. I'll Be Home for Christmas

10\. i'll be home for christmas

Dear Bucky, 

I hope you're doing well. To answer the question in your last letter, I'm fine. It was just a cold, Buck. I got over it quick. In fact, Ms. Maulder a couple flats down brought me over some soup and I've been resting up like you said. I don't know how or why you're worried over me when you're the one getting shot at. 

I feel so helpless over here when you're a thousand miles away, but I've been staying out of trouble. Joshua Martinez actually lent me a book that's kept me up reading most nights. It's called "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn." Although it intrigues me, I don't know if you'd like it as much. It follows a young girl and the struggles she goes through, which, as I'm writing this, sounds more and more like a romance or something. It's not. Well, not really.

Other than that, there's not much happening on my end. Actually, I was at mass the other day and you'll never guess who I ran into -- Sister Loretta! I'm sure you remember her. I don't think she recognised me but you... she'd definitely recognise you, so maybe it was lucky you weren't with me. Anyway, be careful. 

Don't worry about me, Buck. I'll be just fine. You just worry about getting home in time for Christmas. I've got to share these Christmas cookies with someone. Hurry back!

Yours, 

Steve Rogers


	11. Different

11\. candles 

"It's so nice to have you home, Buck." Steve says as they relax on the couch, listening to radio. Bucky's mother has put candles in all the available windows, illuminating the dark room and inviting shadows to come out and play. The light flickers off Bucky's features, his straight, sharp nose, his slightly combed hair... 

"Good to be back." he replies, nodding his head to the song.

Steve doesn't know if he should bring it up. He knows Bucky has had a couple nightmares involving him in combat, but to be honest, he has no idea when the last one happened. "Um..." he starts lamely. "Are you still having the dreams?"

"Steve..." Bucky lets the threat hang in the air.

"I'm just wondering! I mean, I worry about you is all." 

"Well don't." Bucky snaps. "Because I'm fine." 

Steve knows all men come home from war different than they were before; it's a known fact. Bucky's still _Bucky_ , but there's something off about him, something more distant. Reserved, even. Steve sighs, more worried than ever. "You can talk to me, you know. I can't claim to say I know what it's like but... just don't hold back, okay?"

Bucky nods, almost solemnly. "I know, I'm sorry. I just..." He runs a hand through his dishevelled hair. "It's different being home. I can't really explain it."

"Do you want to be back? In England?" Steve is surprised at his response. _Maybe_ , Steve thinks, _he didn't miss me at all_.

"No, not necessarily. I don't miss the fighting, the sounds. God, it's so loud over there. Never quiet, even at night when you're supposed to be sleeping. It's never quiet." Bucky tries to explain. Steve is still confused, but he nods like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "I guess I'm just so used to being _there_ that it feels strange being _here_. You know what I mean?"

Steve hesitates, not quite sure what to say, and to his surprise Bucky chuckles. "It's okay, I know that doesn't make sense. Don't worry about it, I'm fine." He turns up the volume on the radio.


	12. Steve and Ice Don't Mix

12\. ice skating

"Bucky, this is a terrible idea." Steve tells him nervously as the other man adjusts his collar in the mirror. 

" _Great_ idea." Bucky corrects him. 

Bucky's set them up on a double date, which is a great idea... for Bucky. Not for Steve. No girls ever like Steve and he knows it full well. He's small, pasty, thin, and he has no idea how to dance or ice skate for that matter. 

"I don't even know how to ice skate!" Steve points out as soon as the thought hits him. 

Bucky brushes it off. "It's easy. Becca will teach you!" 

Becca. The girl Bucky's so kindly set Steve up with. The girl he's never even met before. "You'll love her." Bucky adds, seeing Steve's worried face. 

* * *

And she's beautiful, she is. Short, light hair frames her face and Steve can already tell she's taller than he is. Bucky's girl is standing to the right of Becca, waving. "Hey, Sergeant!"

Bucky laughs and waves back. "Hey Sandy! Okay," he says, handing Steve his skates, "put them on like this. When you're on the ice, take slow steps at first, so you don't fall."

"Yeah, okay." Steve fits the skates over his feet and uncertainly follows Bucky on to the ice.

"Becca, this is Steve." Bucky introduces them and to Steve's surprise, she doesn't look like she wants to run away from him.

"Hi." she says shyly and Steve can only nod like an idiot.  He watches Bucky extend his arm as Sandy takes it. The glide away, arm in arm. 

"I, um... I don't really know how to ice skate."

Becca laughs. "Oh, I take lessons. It's pretty easy to get the hang of it. See, just... yeah!"

Steve takes a hesitant step forward. Huh. Not that bad. 

"Got it?" She takes his hand in her mittened one. "It's alright, we'll go slow."

They do go slow but eventually pick up the speed so that they're going more than six miles an hour. Steve is laughing at something Becca's said when his feet fly out from under him. He instinctively tries to catch himself, twisting his ankle in the process. There's a little cry of pain before Becca's leaning over him. "Are you okay?"

"F-fine." Steve grits out but knows he should probably take his foot out of his skate before it gets too swollen. 

"Let's sit down." Becca helps him up, Steve's face flushed with cold and humiliation, and they hobble over to a bench. 

She's untying his skate when Bucky and Sandy slide to a stop, spraying ice over the edge of the rink. "Steve? You okay?"

"He just fell." Becca explains, removing the skate to show an already bruised and swollen ankle. 

"Oh, that's kind of gross." Sandy says, turning away. 

"My mom was a nurse, so I'm used to it." Becca tells everyone, making Steve fall a little harder in love with her. 

 


	13. A Source of Warmth

13\. kittens

Steve's mom is dead. 

Still, it doesn't feel real. The tuberculosis got her so fast, he feels like he didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. One minute she was there, the next she wasn't.

Steve actually hasn't left his apartment for five days. Bucky's visited everyday and the widow next door, Ms. Abbott, has brought him dinner for the past couple of nights. Today is his first day leaving the comforts of his tacky, plaid couch. His eyes are still red when he goes out and there's a handkerchief half tucked in his pants pocket. All he gets are some eggs, because if there's one thing he can cook, it's eggs. 

But on the way home, a tiny mewling sound brings him out of his thoughts about his mother. Alone in a cardboard box is a single kitten, black and white (but mostly white). Steve's heart breaks for the second time that week as he scoops up the pathetic thing and tucks in in his coat pocket. They're both shivering by the time they make it home and when Bucky comes for his daily visit, Steve has to explain how he came about having his own cat. 


	14. Fish

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by my own bruised eye, as I was punched in the face today. Not to fret, I do taekwondo. I was just sparring and got whacked in the face, but that's okay, because I got her back! Anyway, enjoy!

14\. glitter

"What is _that_?" Bucky asks, pointing to the scrawny, dirty thing wriggling on the couch. He's just come in from working at the docks and has brought them both apples. He knows Steve is still hurting over his mother's death. Shit, it's been like four days, and Bucky's spent most of them away from Steve, in his time of need. 

"That," Steve says, scooping up the creature, "is a kitten." Even though the most white kitten's filthy, his eyes are glittering. 

Bucky joins them on the sofa. "What'd you name him?" He kicks off his boots and exhales a sigh of relief. It's good to be home.

"I didn't. Couldn't think of one." Steve's voice sounds raw and sad. 

"Huh. Well the little guy definitely needs a bath." 

Steve nods. "We could wash him in the sink."

"Steve, have you ever owned a cat? Usually it's a challenge to get a cat into a thing of water."

"Trust me, he's a good cat. He likes water." 

Bucky starts to tell Steve that he's sounding awfully childish, but something twists inside him, maybe sympathy, and he doesn't. "Okay, fine. Let's see what he's made of."

The two fill the kitchen sink halfway and have a towel ready. "Okay," Bucky tell him, "if the little guy starts freaking out, we just need to cover him in enough water to get him damp so we can rub the dirt out of his fur."

Steve nods and with both hands, lowers the kitten into the water. To Bucky's great surprise, the skinny kitten seems to _like_ it, splashing around enthusiastically. "See? I told you he hates it." Bucky jokes and he smiles when it makes Steve laugh. 

"I know what I want to name the cat."

Bucky's curious now. "What're you gonna name it?"

"Fish." Steve says and then they're both laughing and for a split second, Steve forgets his ma is dead. 


	15. You're a Punk

15\. snowball fights

Steve's walking home from art class when he's pegged in the back with a snowball. It isn't thrown hard enough to knock him down, but he does stumble forward and manages to hold on to all his textbooks. 

"Hey!" Bucky's voice calls and echoes off the walls of the courtyard. Steve turns around, surprised. 

"Bucky?" Seeing his friend's poised hand, ready to throw another one, Steve sighs. "Buck, I don't have time for these games. I have to study for my finals. In fact, you should be studying--"

Another snowball whizzes towards him and Steve barely dodges it. "C'mon, not funny."

"What, you gonna run, Rogers?"

Steve never runs from a fight. He carefully sets his books down on the brick steps and turns to face his opponent. "Never." 

Bucky rears back and throws a ball of mostly ice. Steve ducks behind a tree and hears the ice shatter against the truck. "Another miss, Barnes? Tsk tsk."

"I'd shut it if I were--" This time, a snowball from Steve's side hits him in the stomach. "Alright, you asked for it." Bucky's hurling snowballs like there's no tomorrow and Steve figures he'll have to come out from behind the tree at some point. So finally, a ready snowball in his numb hands, he leaps out and throws it, which soars across the courtyard and hits Bucky directly in the face. His friend falls backwards, clutching his nose. Steve is running towards him, wheezing a bit, and drops down into the snow. 

"Buck? You okay?"

At first, Bucky doesn't say anything, but then he lightly punches Steve on the shoulder. "You're a punk, you know that?"

Steve smiles sheepishly. "Yeah, I know.


	16. Apple Cider

16\. spice

"I can't believe you're leaving tomorrow." Steve says, frowning. "It seems like you just got back."

Bucky reaches over from where he is on the couch to ruffle Steve's hair. "Aw, c'mon. You'll be fine. I'll write when I can."

Steve nods, like this is no consolation. "Yeah. I'll write to you all the time."

"Here." Bucky snatches a bottle from the coffee table in front of them. "A buddy of mine sent me this a few days ago. It's spiced cider..." Bucky trails off, winking. "With a kick."

"Oh, no. Buck, you don't want to be sick when you ship off."

"Ah, you worry too much." Bucky laughs, pouring Steve a glass. "Drink."

Steve puts the glass to his lips and prays that he won't rue the night the next morning. He sips carefully, a tiny swallow, and lets the bitter and sweet flavours compliment each other. "Mm... I like it."

Bucky raises his glass. "To alcohol." 

"And friendship." Steve adds, like the sap he is. They clink glasses.

* * *

Three glasses later, Steve feels warm and fuzzy inside. He forgets that Bucky's a soldier in the war. He forgets that Bucky's departing for England tomorrow. And he definitely forgets to do the dishes that night.

When Bucky wakes up in the wee hours of the morning, he _almost_ regrets finishing the entire bottle of cider the previous night. _Almost_. But he smiles at Steve's sleeping figure, curled up on the couch, and quietly leaves.  


	17. Chapter 17

17\. fireplace

Bucky's been missing for some time. Seeing these soldiers makes Steve's stomach flip. "Sergeant Barnes? Does anyone know Bucky Barnes?"

A skinny guy with a mustache nods. "He was with us, but they took him back there." He jerks his thumb in the direction behind them. "Never came back."

"Who? _Who_ took him?"

* * *

 

"Bucky." The word comes out like a gasp, so much so that Steve almost doesn't hear it himself. " _Bucky_."

His best friend is lying on some kind of operating table, strapped down. He's mumbling something but Steve can't quite make it out. He quickly rips Bucky free and helps him sit up. "Steve?" Bucky asks hoarsely and Steve can only nod. "'M cold."

"Alright, let's get you out of here. We'll take you to a nice warm place." Steve promises as he lifts Bucky up into a standing position.

"Warm place..." he repeats. "Fireplace."

Steve doesn't care where they go, as long as they make it back together.


	18. My Apartment or Yours?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for an influx of drabbles... I was out for a week for finals and let's just say I have a ton of drabbles to post.

18\. office party

"A toast," Dum Dum Dugan declares, raising his glass along with the other Howling Commandos, "to our friend Steve."

"To our brother Steve." Gabriel corrects, and the others echo him. "To our brother Steve."

Steve smiles somewhat bashfully and accepts the toast. They clink glasses and begin to drink, all laughter and cheer. 

Dino sets his glass down. "It's almost Christmas fellas, and we're in uniform."

"Ugh." Izzy leans back in his chair.

"Double ugh." Dum Dum adds. 

Bucky's been surprisingly quiet the whole evening, but Steve feels like he should say something. "Oh, c'mon guys. We're doing what's right; fighting the good fight." There are a few grumbles of agreement. "Besides, there isn't a Christmas like Christmas with you guys."

"Here, here!" Someone shouts and suddenly there's another round.

* * *

Maybe the other guys don't quite realise it yet, but Steve can't get drunk. It's literally impossible. So when the others are losing count of their drinks and stumbling for the door, Steve's still clear-eyed and coherent. 

Bucky looks exhausted and drained, and Steve's not surprised. He's probably more than a little drunk, too. 

"Hey, Buck? You wanna go home?" Steve asks, prepared to carry him back to their bunks if need be.

Bucky nods slowly. "My apartment or yours?"

Steve doesn't know if that's him or the vodka talking.

 


	19. Spiked Egg Nog

19\. spiked egg nog

"That was a bad idea." Bucky moans, head between his knees. Steve is rubbing him on the back. "Dum Dum is an idiot."

"Actually," Steve interjects, "you're the idiot for listening to him."

The previous night, Bucky was challenged by his fellow Howling Commandos to a drinking contest. Of course, Bucky couldn't just turn down a challenge. Spiked egg nog didn't taste the same coming back up.

"Steve..." he groans. "You're supposed to be on my side."

"I am, I am." Steve assures him. "Just... slightly disappointed you couldn't down more than five glasses."

"Ugh. Let's not talk about it."

Steve rubs his hair fondly. "Whatever you say."


	20. When We Were Kids

20\. silly traditions

"Buck? Are you awake?"

It's a little past midnight so of course Bucky's awake. "Hmm?"

"It's Christmas." Steve whispers from adjacent bunk. "Remember how when we were kids we'd pull off all the couch cushions and sleep together?"

Bucky smiles in the dark. "Steve, that's just a silly tradition. We're in the army now, for Gods' sake."

He can almost hear the defeat in Steve's voice. "I know. I just thought... well, I don't know what I thought. I was just reminiscing is all."

"You missing being a 90 pound asthmatic?" Bucky asks even though he knows how Steve will respond.

"No, I miss Christmases with you. How they used to be."

"Huh. Well I'm not going to argue." Bucky says, because he knows their room is empty and they're completely alone. When Steve crawls into bed with his best friend, he feels a familiar warmth. 

"It's not just a silly tradition." Steve mumbles, turning into him. They're so close together, Steve can feel his heart beating. "I know."


	21. I'd Rather Not

21\. family gatherings

It's Bucky's first Christmas since he was the Winter Soldier. He's spending it with Steve because who else is there to spend it with? Truth be told, Steve was invited to Stark's annual Christmas party, but he had a feeling Bucky wasn't ready for that. So, they were both at home watching Rudolph and eating cookies that Sam had dropped off. 

"What's the big deal with Rudolph? Now there's a movie, a song, plush toys..."

Steve laughs, mouth full of cookie. "I know... I think the movie was made in the 50's and then everyone took the idea and ran with it, basically."

"Huh." Bucky says, mildly perplexed. "I wouldn't have guessed."

"Yeah. The only bad thing about Christmas now is how commercialised it is. Did you know there are LEGO sets for $200?" 

"Wow. Those little plastic bricks?"

"Yeah."

It's quiet for a moment until Bucky speaks up. "I know you didn't go to Stark's Christmas party because of me."

"Bucky--"

"No, I know. I just..." he trails off before directly looking at Steve. "Don't miss out on things because I'm holding you back. I would've been fine alone, you know."

"It's Christmas." Steve argues. "And besides, I'd rather be here with you, than finding out what Tony's white elephant gift for me is. Last year it was..." Steve blushes furiously. "A skimpy piece of a woman's underwear." 

Bucky nearly chokes. "A thong? Tony gave you a thong?" 

Steve looks at him. "Wait. How do you not know how big Rudolph is but you do know about thongs?" 

Bucky just laughs.


	22. Unwanted Surprises

22\. unwanted christmas presents

The next Christmas, Steve takes Bucky to Tony's annual holiday party. By this time, Bucky knows who all the Avengers are and what they're like, for the most part. But there are always unwanted surprises. 

"Hey, Buck-o! This one's for you." Tony exclaims, tossing a wrapped present at the former assassin.

"Don't call me that." he snaps, but does begin to open the gift. What's inside can only be... "Socks?"

Steve raises an eyebrow as the rest of the team looks on, curious as to what Bucky's holding up. The socks are blue with little Christmas trees on them. The trees are decked with ornaments and lights. 

Tony is practically squirming. "Press that button by the ankle." he begs, eyes sparkling. 

Bucky hesitantly does as told and the socks light up the room. A cursive "Merry Christmas" goes along both sides in neon lights and the Christmas tree lights _actually_ light up.

"Light up socks," Steve chuckles, smiling, "no way."

Bucky's less than please. "Uh. Thanks." He tries to politely put them back in the box but Tony shakes his head. "Nuh uh. You've gotta wear them now." 

He starts to tense up in annoyance but Steve pats his arm and says, "C'mon, it's Christmas."

Bucky doesn't know what the hell that has to do with it but he shrugs and puts the socks on anyway. 


	23. Mistletoe

23\. under the mistletoe

"It's Christmas Eve Eve." Bucky informs Steve the minute his eyes open. 

Steve smiles, still half asleep. "Is it?" He stifles a yawn behind his fist. "How long have you been awake?"

"Long enough. C'mon, Sleepy, let's get some breakfast."

* * *

Bucky's no cook but he's managed to throw together some breakfast essentials: pancakes, bacon, coffee. And...

Steve squints at the chandalier hanging above their kitchen table. "Is that... is that mistletoe?"

Bucky nods.

"Huh. That's funny. I don't remember putting that up there. Did you--"

"Yes." Bucky says, hand resting on a bowl of pancake batter that's balanced on his hip. He kisses Steve long and hard and it's wonderful. 

 


	24. Old Dogs

24\. re-gifting

"Go on, open it." Steve urges, practically on the edge of his seat. He and Bucky are opening gifts the next morning. 

Bucky shakes the small box only to hear a soft jingling. "I'm guessing this isn't the box set of _Gilmore Girls_ I asked for."

Steve nearly spits out his coffee, he's laughing so hard. "No, no. Just open it."

"Okay, fine." He carefully unties the red ribbon and lifts the top of the box to reveal a silver necklace. "No way..."

"Yes way." 

"Are these...? They can't be--"

"Your old dog tag, yeah." Steve nods, satisfied. 

The silver tag has James B Barnes printed neatly in all capital letters. Bucky shakes his head in disbelief before letting it hang around his neck. "I can't believe this. Where'd you even find it? I was sure it was long gone by now."

"What can I say?" Steve smiles. "I'm Captain America."


End file.
